1. ACCEPT THE GRIEF:   Roll with the tides of it. Do not try to be "brave". Take time to cry. This also applies to men; strong men can and do cry.
2. TALK ABOUT IT:  Share the grief within the family. Do not attempt to protect them by silence. Find a friend to talk to, somone who will listen without passing judgement. If possible, find someone who has experienced a similar sorrow. Talk often. If a friend tells you to "snap out of it", find another friend.
3. KEEP BUSY:  Do purposeful work that occupies the mind but avoid frantic activity.
4. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF:  Bereavement can be a threat to your health. At the moment, you may feel that you don't care. That will change.you are important and your life is valuable. Care for it.
5. EAT WELL:  At this time of emotional and physical depletion your body needs good nourishment more than ever. If you pick at your food, a vitamin supplement might be helpful, but it will not make up for a poor diet. Be good to yourself.
6. EXERCISE REGULARLY:  Return to your own program or start one as soon as possible. Depression can be lightened by the biochemicals changes brought by exercise, and you will sleep better. An hour-long walk every day is ideal for many people.
7. GET RID OF IMAGINED GUILT:  You did the best you could at the time, all things considered. If you were mistaken, learn to accept that we are all imperfect. only hindsight is 20-20. If you are convinced you have real guilt seek spiritual or professional counseling.
8. ACCEPT YOUR UNDERSTANDING OF THE DEATH FOR THE TIME BEING:  You have probably asked "why" over and over and have finally realized that you will get no acceptable answer; but you probably have some small degreee of understanding. Use that as your viewpoint until you are able to work up to another level of understanding.
9. JOIN A GROUP OF OTHERS WHO ARE SORROWING:  Your old circle of friends may change. Even if it does not, you will need new friends who have been thorugh you experience. Bereaved people sometimes form groups for friendship and sharing.
10. ASSOCIATE WITH OLD FREINDS ALSO:  This may be difficult. Some will be embarrassed by your presence, but they will get over it. If and when you can talk natuarally, without avoiding the subject of your loss.
11. POSTPONE MAJOR DECISIONS:  For example, wait before deciding to sell your home or change jobs.
12. RECORD YOUR THOUGHTS IN A JOURNAL:  If you are at all inclined toward writting, it will help to get your feelings out and record your progress.
13. TURN GRIEF INTO CREATIVE ENERGY:  Find a way to help others. Helping someone else's load is guaranteed to lighten your own. If you have writting ability, use it. Great literature has been written as a tribute to someone loved and lost.
14. TAKE ADVANTAGE OF RELIGIOUS AFFILIATION:  If you have one. If you have been inactive in matters of faith, this might be the time to become involved again. The bible has much to say about sorrow. old hymns are relevant. As time passes, you may find that you are not so angry at God after all.
15. GET PROFESSIONAL HELP IF NEEDED:  Don't allow crippling grief to continue. There comes a time to stop crying and live again. Sometimes, a few sessions with a trained counselor will help you resolve anger,guilt and despair that may keep you functioning.

Beaches Memorial Park